Ask the expert… children asking about the donor

My two children, now 9 and 11, were conceived by artificial insemination from the same sperm donor, yet look totally different from each other. They do not believe that they have the same dad and they are insisting I prove to them they are fathered by the same man. What should I do? J Henderson

Write to the clinic that you used and ask for a letter confirming that ‘donor 424’ was used in both inseminations.

Explain to your children that they will have a legal right to seek out their father when they are 18 and they can see the likenesses for themselves.

Point them to famous siblings who do not resemble each other, such as David Beckham and his sister, so they can see for themselves that mixed genes from both a mother and a father can result in surprising variations.

Expert advice provided by Aunt Broody

The My Future Family Fertility Show offers a chance to spend a day surround by a full range of exhibitors who all focus on helping you to start your family, no matter what journey you decide on. It is friendly and welcoming and you can attend seminars or access free confidential 1-2-1 advice. You can ask experts face-to-face and establish who is the best fit for you – your fertility journey is unique and it is important that you find the best people that work for you.

For more details about when the My Future Family Fertility Show is next taking place, please check out our Fertility Show page.

The My Future Family Fertility show supports a wide range of alternative family options including:

• Surrogacy • Fertility options for older women • single women • Fostering & adoption • LGBT parenting • Co-parenting by choice

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